Beginning at the Beginning

As was promised in the first editorial of this serial attempt to debunk the falsehoods and misinformation put forth by the purported 'novel', 'Ovoid, Illinois', the editorial staff of the Ovoid Elyssium Herald, south-east- central Illinois' last remaining family-owned newspaper, has determined the best and most appropriate place to begin this project is at the beginning. As is logical, this determination of process will inevitably lead to the middle and then onward to the end.

By the time the end is reached, it is hoped that the wicked and banal calumny shall be o'erturned by the gleaning of the fact from the facetious fiction and thusly redeem the reputation of  the Ovoid community as a whole and with judicious use of truth cleanse and absolve the besmirched character of Ovoidian personages historic and contemporary much as the ancient Apelles was redeemed by the revelation of a friend who cited the slander as odious thus saving the noble Apelles from Ptolomy's lethal condemnation.

Such a friend to the citizens of Ovoid are the staff of the Elyssium Herald.

It has further been determined by the editorial staff that this series will not critique the ignoble scribblings as literature as they most assuredly are not and should not be accredited with such a high-flown and undeserved designation.

Furthermore, as the 'devil is in the details' it has been determined that at the risk of being decried as petty, niggling and obsessed with piddling trivialities, the small errors of this slanderous, erroneous narration shall be pointed out at every opportunity of which there are a plethora given the slap-dashed, slipshod, higgledy-piggledy mishmash that the author has tried to foist upon the reading public.

Having more clearly and thoughtfully stated the intentions of our staff vis-a-vis the published opprobrium regretfully entitled 'Ovoid, Illinois', the series will tackle the text of the aforementioned work of slander and, beginning at the beginning will bring to an end this offensive affront to Ovoid residents past and present.

A. Babbage II
editor